The white path.

There is one girl I know that can't walk normally. She is not disabled, her legs are strong and healthy, but she can't walk. Every step she takes is a torture, the pain is unbearable, so she decides to stop and think of a different way to carry on.
She is afraid to carry on because she know at the end she'll get there. And what the hell is there? Maybe nothing, maybe just empty space. How scary is that? Well, scary enough to make you think twice with every step you take...
So sometimes, she just sits on the bed and waste time thinking on how can one get to its happy ending without having to walk through mountains of disappointment, swim oceans of rejection, kick the stones of the ugly truth out of the way.....and all that just to get to the top and see that what you left behind will remain there if you decide to turn back....because the happy ending is still an ending, and we all want to be able to start over...So she sits and plans and stays in the same point, looking around in awareness, too scared to dare to fail.
In our trip of non return, shall we dare to fail?
Shaila

Synthetic freedon, cohibited expressions.

We are in the era of expression. It's all about what you say, what you do, what you show. And this that you say, do and show is sculpted by the chisel of our frustrations which also draws a happy caricature of who we'd like to be.

In the infinite space of our computer we let ourselves go just enough to get the approval of those to which we dedicate our actions, no more and no less.

Sometimes, tempted by honesty, or maybe in a desperate attemp to call an attention that we no longer know how to call in the real world, we allow ourselves to post a picture that invites gossip to enter our lives (most times this gossip is actually pursued), or a perfectly addecuate radical comment...and we wait for the results...

It's fun to see who comment what and how, who keep their silence and who passes by, smile and go.

In this cyberspace's square we all meet up with our best faces, with perfect songs and perfect moments, with a huge sack that hides all that we do not want to show and that belongs to our real nature. And here we are at this party where nobody sees anything unexpected and nobody gets hurt. It's the ideal happy wax house that is!! And being uncertain wether this appreciation of mine is right or wrong, the thing is that everybody is in this party.

This affects us in our relationships with others, the real ones, demanding much more intensity, more magic, more space and more softness to the point that we find ourselves asking for a pretty puppet because HUMANS are no longer valid. They demand too much from us, they demand another human...!!!

Shaila

Pude olvidar y no quise.

Estoy escuchando El Bicho. De vez en cuando, siempre que el lazo con mis raices cede, escucho El Bicho. Y cada vez siento mas hondo cosas que no sabia que vivian en mi. Te echo de menos. Extrano la sensacion de pertenencia, esa que sentia bajo tu sol.

Y con cada quejio hay una punzada que me recuerda que todavia soy tuya, que nada ha cambiado.

Quiero borrar la caricatura que te han dibujado en esta tierra fria, quiero ensenar tu cara, tu belleza y tu sentir, y no lo consigo! Cada vez que asomo uno de tus colores hay una explosion de suspiros a mi alrededor y me abruma, asi que decido no continuar. Sera que tienes una luz insoportable para los ojos extranjeros, sera que solo yo puedo verte realmente.....por que no me ves tu a mi?!

Quiero que no haya palabra alguna entre nosotros, ya nos sobra la intensidad de nuestras miradas. Pero me falta el momento en el que tu me mires y yo pueda desviar la cara placidamente, segura de que tu tambien me perteneces.

Creci contigo y queme todos los puentes que nos unian, todos menos uno, que cruzo cuando el azahar me llama. Ese puente es ahora mi unica esperanza, aunque se muy bien que tu nunca lo cruzaras porque si lo haces, ya nada tendra sentido. Debes quedarte en el sur, debes alimentarlo de vida y de arena. Yo respirare tu aire agradecida y me echare una que otra sienta bajo tus olivos, con eso me basta. Pero por favor no te apagues, nunca te apagues, te necesito!

Te pido que conserves las chicharras en agosto, los vientos en abril y el silencio en enero.

En la mesita te deje una lista con lo que me gustaria encontrar la proxima vez que nos veamos, leela. Tambien te deje la ultima sonrisa despistada en un sobre, esa no la compartas por favor, te la dejo por si algun dia tu tambien me echas de menos...

Shaila

Left is the new right.

Over many centuries society has created concepts for what we understand is good and bad. We decided to relate those terms to the left and the right, dividing the world in two, the light and the darkness. And some abnormal (most probably roman catholic), kept the left side of things under the shadows, until it became bitter, twisted and grey, right? Well I don't approve the use of left and right anymore, it is not right that left is left behind!

Jesus sits at the right side of God

You wait to marry Mr. Right

A correct sum is right.

Conservatives are on the right, communists on the left.

If you don't want it anymore, it'll be the left overs

If you are weak, you'll be left...

NON SENSE!

DIESTRO Y SINIESTRO, light and shadows......here is a campaign to support whatever is left from the left, and make things right with this wrong injustice!

I am left handed, and it feels right. I'm living in the sinister side, and there is plenty of sun here, FYI.

Shaila

I'm thirsty.

Today is friday. A very cold friday with any other particularity than boredom. I have been reading and listening to some songs that nearly take me somewhere special, somewhere I will take you one day. But then I open my eyes and I'm still here.
I read a bit more, get into the story, and then you come again into my thoughts:
-Would you leave me alone with my boredom, please?
-But I like to come and go, your mind is always so keen to dream...
-You need to understand that I need to detoxify myself from you, amor. You have to go. Or at least come just in special ocasions, like on the day we first met, for example, that's allowed I guess.
-.....It sounds fair, but everytime you think of me I feel empowered, bright, loved!!!! It's a vicious feeling!!!
-Well, in that case, I promise I will read about the sex life of the flies until one of us decide to leave.
-Hahahahaa, you are nuts Shaila.
- Yes. I am.

Anybody there could hand me anything about the sex life of the flies, please????

Meanwhile I will continue dreaming about that place, absorbing the magic of that moment, believing unbelievable things, painting life how I please. You would be bright yellow, amor. I would be red. Our eyes would meet in a green explotion of blues and browns, and around us only rivers and oceans and lakes and waterfalls, because I'm thirsty, amor, I am thirsty.

Shaila

The empty box.

Antes de nada, Feliz Anio Nuevo a todos!! Hoy es el primer dia del anio, ese que se toma como referente y coordenada para poner el huevo de una vida nueva. Resoluciones, promesas, deseos y propositos que tornan mas faciles cuando es 1 de enero. Pues bien, mis propositos de este anio estan ahi, como los de todos, solo que esta vez he decidido organizarme un poco mas.
Tengo una caja vacia, una caja especial. No es cuadrada, no tiene fondo, no me ocupa espacio, pero guardara todo lo que yo vaya consiguiendo en mi vida y todo lo que logre superar.
Le hice compartimentos para todos los tipos de miedo. Tiene una red que atrapa la pereza y hasta hice celdas para la gula, la soberbia y la envidia!!! Esas estaran bajo llave.
Separado de los chungos derrotados estaran los logros. La habitacion mas grande se la llevan las risas, que nunca van solas, siempre traen a amigos que se hacen amantes que invitan al amor. Asi que necesitan mas espacio.
La cordura comparte cama con la locura; estan condenadas a vivir juntas hasta que se lleven bien y bueno, deje una habitacion de invitados para la abundancia, la inspiracion y la suerte, porque ellos son muy independientes y les gusta entrar y salir a su aire, asi con en este caso hare una excepcion y dejare la puerta abierta, confiando en que se sientan comodos y decidan quedarse.
Pues ahi esta mi plan. Seguro que acaba todo manga por hombro y termina el amor durmiendo con el miedo, las risas haciendo orgia con la gula y la pereza matandose con la envidia!! Y es que esta cajita ha de moverse a mi ritmo.... :-)

Shaila